(212) 807-6395
(866) 9-ADOPT-1
(866) 9-ADOPT-1
24 east 12th. Street, suite2A-F
New York, NY 10003
Post Adoption Coaching and Consulting - faq
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Contact Us
postadoptionfamily@yahoo.com
24 east 12th. Street, suite2A-F New York, NY 10003 |
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FAQ
Definition: Adoption Coach
What is adoption coaching?
The birth of a family through adoption is a creative and constructive process, healthy in nature and life enhancing in purpose. Though different in origination, the adoption family, like all families, represents mankinds' greatest achievement. Unique to the family created by adoption are increased relationship complexities and emotional vulnerabilities which makes the universal challenge for health and success more daunting. Specifically is the reality that adoption families evolve out of loss- by the birth mother, the parents and the child- and such primal loss brings in its wake basic insecurity and feelings of inadequacy which have to be sensitively worked through for healthy, loving relationships to develop.
The adoption coach, like a physical trainer for an athlete, helps those involved in the family of adoption work through this sometime painful process while reducing potential injuries to reach their goals more effectively than one may achieve on their own.
Although all methods of psychological and emotional help utilize interpersonal communication as it's main means of work, adoption coaching differs from intensive psychotherapy and counseling in its focus. Psychotherapy and mental health counseling are focused on treating severe trauma and diagnosable medical conditions. It is a general approach. Adoption coaching is sensitive to and considers the uniqueness of the past of those involved in the adoption process. It is designed to help with those issues particular to the adoption process as well as more general psychological concerns. While dealing with the impact of the past, the emphasis is on the here and now present and the envisioned future. By recognizing and understanding the current individual actions and relationship patterns created in reaction to basic loss and insecurity and their influence on future developments, we are better able to regulate our lives while creating a more satisfying future. When my newly arrived son surrounded his room with action figures and burst into tears lest they were moved, I understood his symbolically expressed need for security and control in a new and overwhelming situation and gave that my priority. Coaching focuses on enhancing the quality of your life and increasing the satisfaction you get from it. When my son had his first meal with us and wanted to eat everyone's food with his own inviolate, the recognition and understanding of his behavior made it possible to be all the more loving and accepting. Coaching is about increasing your constructive output with clarity, understanding, control and skill development, reducing the impact of destructive tendencies with negative resistance resolution and working through unresolved issues with insight. Understanding that my son's aggressive behaviors were a means of communication and contact provided me with the objectivity necessary for making the right judgments. When my wife momentarily distracted me while my son was showing me a video game and he withdrew into angry sullenness, I recognized that his overwhelming fears of abandonment were reactivated and I could focus my efforts on helping him recover.
My goal is to share what I have learned through personal trial and error and forty years of professional education and experience with you for your benefit in your striving for harmony, happiness and success.
Is adoption coaching for me?
The road to success for adoption families is more challenging and the perils greater than that facing biological families yet the vast majority survive without serious dysfunctionality requiring intensive psychotherapy or counseling. An alliance with an adoption coach can help prevent the development of problems, avoid pitfalls, increase awareness and understanding of emotional complexities, enhance the satisfaction of the journey and increase the likelihood of success for the family and the individuals in it.
For the vast majority, adoption coaching can be the most efficacious means of satisfying their individual and family needs and desires for help.
Coaching fortunately enables individuals and families to enhance their awareness and understanding of themselves and others, develop their strengths, discover more satisfying pathways to their goals, create more fulfilling relationships and deal with their stresses and life challenges more effectively without the damaging side effects of social stigma and public labeling which too often accompanies psychotherapy.
When is it needed?
Adoption is a lifetime process which affects us continually and in different ways as we move through different stages in our lives. Those involved in the adoption process constitute a high risk group for behavioral, emotional or relationship problems; therefore they have a special need for effective, appropriate services. When we are in a particular stage of personal and family development, coaching can help us to maximize our potentials and resolve our resistances to constructive functioning; during transitions which are fraught with anxiety and confusion it can stabilize, clarify and support and during specific crises and challenges it can enlighten and guide us to new levels of understanding and achievement. Above all, the most important factor influencing satisfying and successful results is the quality of our personal relationships and it is here that
adoption coaching can enhance our understanding and skills in communicating which strengthen our attachments and bonds; increases our self knowledge, brightens our self esteem and facilitates the development of plans for continued satisfying relationships throughout a lifetime. This work results in an increase in emotional intelligence and resiliency which is the biggest predictor of personal and vocational success.
- A therapeutically skilled and trained professional who is also knowledgeable of adoption issues and dynamics, experienced in working with those in the extended adoption family and passionate in his/her interest
- An ally, a mentor, a supportive and trustworthy guide and facilitator, an objective educator who can recognize, clarify and understand the complex feelings and thoughts that all in the adoption process- the first mother, the parents, the child, siblings and relatives go through
- A fellow traveler who has learned from his own experiences to avoid the pitfalls and obstacles which can lead to the development of serious problems
- A co-creator who can help us develop and achieve our personal and satisfying goals and vision for the future.
What is adoption coaching?
The birth of a family through adoption is a creative and constructive process, healthy in nature and life enhancing in purpose. Though different in origination, the adoption family, like all families, represents mankinds' greatest achievement. Unique to the family created by adoption are increased relationship complexities and emotional vulnerabilities which makes the universal challenge for health and success more daunting. Specifically is the reality that adoption families evolve out of loss- by the birth mother, the parents and the child- and such primal loss brings in its wake basic insecurity and feelings of inadequacy which have to be sensitively worked through for healthy, loving relationships to develop.
The adoption coach, like a physical trainer for an athlete, helps those involved in the family of adoption work through this sometime painful process while reducing potential injuries to reach their goals more effectively than one may achieve on their own.
Although all methods of psychological and emotional help utilize interpersonal communication as it's main means of work, adoption coaching differs from intensive psychotherapy and counseling in its focus. Psychotherapy and mental health counseling are focused on treating severe trauma and diagnosable medical conditions. It is a general approach. Adoption coaching is sensitive to and considers the uniqueness of the past of those involved in the adoption process. It is designed to help with those issues particular to the adoption process as well as more general psychological concerns. While dealing with the impact of the past, the emphasis is on the here and now present and the envisioned future. By recognizing and understanding the current individual actions and relationship patterns created in reaction to basic loss and insecurity and their influence on future developments, we are better able to regulate our lives while creating a more satisfying future. When my newly arrived son surrounded his room with action figures and burst into tears lest they were moved, I understood his symbolically expressed need for security and control in a new and overwhelming situation and gave that my priority. Coaching focuses on enhancing the quality of your life and increasing the satisfaction you get from it. When my son had his first meal with us and wanted to eat everyone's food with his own inviolate, the recognition and understanding of his behavior made it possible to be all the more loving and accepting. Coaching is about increasing your constructive output with clarity, understanding, control and skill development, reducing the impact of destructive tendencies with negative resistance resolution and working through unresolved issues with insight. Understanding that my son's aggressive behaviors were a means of communication and contact provided me with the objectivity necessary for making the right judgments. When my wife momentarily distracted me while my son was showing me a video game and he withdrew into angry sullenness, I recognized that his overwhelming fears of abandonment were reactivated and I could focus my efforts on helping him recover.
My goal is to share what I have learned through personal trial and error and forty years of professional education and experience with you for your benefit in your striving for harmony, happiness and success.
Is adoption coaching for me?
The road to success for adoption families is more challenging and the perils greater than that facing biological families yet the vast majority survive without serious dysfunctionality requiring intensive psychotherapy or counseling. An alliance with an adoption coach can help prevent the development of problems, avoid pitfalls, increase awareness and understanding of emotional complexities, enhance the satisfaction of the journey and increase the likelihood of success for the family and the individuals in it.
For the vast majority, adoption coaching can be the most efficacious means of satisfying their individual and family needs and desires for help. Coaching fortunately enables individuals and families to enhance their awareness and understanding of themselves and others, develop their strengths, discover more satisfying pathways to their goals, create more fulfilling relationships and deal with their stresses and life challenges more effectively without the damaging side effects of social stigma and public labeling which too often accompanies psychotherapy.
When is it needed?
Adoption is a lifetime process which affects us continually and in different ways as we move through different stages in our lives. Those involved in the adoption process constitute a high risk group for behavioral, emotional or relationship problems; therefore they have a special need for effective, appropriate services. When we are in a particular stage of personal and family development, coaching can help us to maximize our potentials and resolve our resistances to constructive functioning; during transitions which are fraught with anxiety and confusion it can stabilize, clarify and support and during specific crises and challenges it can enlighten and guide us to new levels of understanding and achievement. Above all, the most important factor influencing satisfying and successful results is the quality of our personal relationships and it is here that
adoption coaching can enhance our understanding and skills in communicating which strengthen our attachments and bonds; increases our self knowledge, brightens our self esteem and facilitates the development of plans for continued satisfying relationships throughout a lifetime. This work results in an increase in emotional intelligence and resiliency which is the biggest predictor of personal and vocational success.